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So, here is the situation. The modem is almost certainly completely shot. What this means for me is that I will not have internet again at home until it is replaced. This is an issue for two reasons. The driveway continues to be nearly impassable for my car (today, a friend of my sister in law dropped me off here at the restaurant so I could get online and check on things), so on top of my usual issues of getting out and about there's that. And then, the account is not mine so I do not know if I can even *get* a replacement once I manage to get to a Verizon/Sprint store. If the stars are all aligned I may be able to get back this week. If not, I will have to wait for the next time my father visits, which is not until the end of the month.
Yeah. I'm trying to hang in there and stuff, but this is playing right into other issues. Like working on a vid, but not being able to bounce it off people. Having people to talk to at 2 am when I'm insomniacal and having mood swings. And I remain out of proportionally upset about missing the Headstones show, and now not even being able to stalk the YouTubes. Rationally, I know that I keep bursting into tears over that because it is heightening my feeling of missing out, on top of the fact that I would be upset about missing the show anyway. But, yeah. It is like all avenues of fannish outlet are cut off, as well as cut off from my dearest friendships.
The last time I went without internet for longer than a day or two was...7 years ago? I can't even emphasize how closed off my world is without it, when you factor in both my mental health and physical issues that keep me isolated. Fuck, fuck, fuckity fuck.
Yeah. I'm trying to hang in there and stuff, but this is playing right into other issues. Like working on a vid, but not being able to bounce it off people. Having people to talk to at 2 am when I'm insomniacal and having mood swings. And I remain out of proportionally upset about missing the Headstones show, and now not even being able to stalk the YouTubes. Rationally, I know that I keep bursting into tears over that because it is heightening my feeling of missing out, on top of the fact that I would be upset about missing the show anyway. But, yeah. It is like all avenues of fannish outlet are cut off, as well as cut off from my dearest friendships.
The last time I went without internet for longer than a day or two was...7 years ago? I can't even emphasize how closed off my world is without it, when you factor in both my mental health and physical issues that keep me isolated. Fuck, fuck, fuckity fuck.