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Yay, I've pretty much completed my festivid!!! There are some minor things that I think I could improve and will futz with it between now and the deadline, but I'm pretty pleased with it as is, so if life gets in the way I could upload it as is and feel confident that I've made a vid I would stand behind, and (hopefully) that my recipient will love.
Once the block broke and things started to come together, I came to a realization about what was causing a lot of my vid angst. On this vid in particular, but also in general. For some reason there is a part of my brain that thinks I should be making vids like someone else. There is a very different vid that could have been made with my source. Probably a more visually stunning vid, actually. But it wouldn't have been me. And yet my brain kept calling me stupid and a horrible vidder for making choices based on the core aspects of myself as a vidder instead of what someone else would do. And that is just silly. I might really admire different aesthetics and vid structures the way other people do them. But that doesn't make my own any less valuable. And more importantly, trying to vid like someone else is unproductive and makes the whole experience of vidding miserable. And, come on, vidding is hard enough as it is without adding stress to the whole business.
I vid like I vid. The specific visuals I choose and how I put them together and why are not just the means by which I make a vid, they are an integral part of who I am as a vidder. And when I think about it, I don't really want to be someone else anyway. In my moments of vid despair I often think I make macaroni art while others are painting masterpieces...but ya know? Macaroni art is actually kind of awesome. :)
Once the block broke and things started to come together, I came to a realization about what was causing a lot of my vid angst. On this vid in particular, but also in general. For some reason there is a part of my brain that thinks I should be making vids like someone else. There is a very different vid that could have been made with my source. Probably a more visually stunning vid, actually. But it wouldn't have been me. And yet my brain kept calling me stupid and a horrible vidder for making choices based on the core aspects of myself as a vidder instead of what someone else would do. And that is just silly. I might really admire different aesthetics and vid structures the way other people do them. But that doesn't make my own any less valuable. And more importantly, trying to vid like someone else is unproductive and makes the whole experience of vidding miserable. And, come on, vidding is hard enough as it is without adding stress to the whole business.
I vid like I vid. The specific visuals I choose and how I put them together and why are not just the means by which I make a vid, they are an integral part of who I am as a vidder. And when I think about it, I don't really want to be someone else anyway. In my moments of vid despair I often think I make macaroni art while others are painting masterpieces...but ya know? Macaroni art is actually kind of awesome. :)
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One of these days I am going to learn things permanently. I'm so much meaner to myself than I *ever* would be to another vidder, it's ridiculous. Like, I adore all the different aesthetics and styles that people have, and it would never even occur to me to think 'well so and so should have made that vid more like so and so would have' because I'd be too busy appreciating whatever uniquue sensibility they bring to their vids. And yet, applying that to myself is so much harder for some reason.
<3 <3 <3 <3 <3 to you.
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God, I think that every single time, except for the "it wouldn't have been me" part. I need to figure out how to just accept my shortcomings and not be so down on myself for not being better.
And, FWIW, I don't tell you often enough, but your vids are awesome. ♥
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It's way too easy to look at our own style of vidding and judge it by standards we'd *never* judge someone else.
*HUGHUGHUGHUG*
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