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Been having a rough couple days. My next followup with oncologist is tomorrow. I don't actually anticipate anything new or scary (I think this is the first time in a long time I will get away without any scans ordered since my health issues have all been stable the last six months). This doesn't seem to stop my body and brain from ramping into high stress mode over the last month, culminating in me spending the last two days sleeping almost constantly and only waking up long enough to engage in obsessive negative thoughts centered around everything from vidding angst to cancer angst. And there's really nothing I can do at this point but ride it out and hope I'll snap back after tomorrow. At least until another six months is up. Or I develop some new random ache or pain.
This five years cannot be over soon enough.
This five years cannot be over soon enough.
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I mean, everyone deserves a good self-pity wallow from time to time and you are more deserving than most but, I can't help but think that if, Spaghetti Monster forbid, the worst happens, instead of feeling like this is a justifiable use of your time, you will be kicking yourself losing the good days to worrying about the bad.
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*huuuuugs*
But when you have gotten through this, let me remind you that Sherlock Holmes starts on the 16th and we should totally SEE IT. OK. I HAVE TO SEE THIS MOVIE.
AND YOU DO TOO, BECAUSE IT WILL MAKE YOU GO ":D".
ALSO, DO YOU WANT TO BAKE A YULE LOG? I THINK YOU DO. ^_^
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I hear you on the ramping-up, though. I'm trying to control mine ATM (am scheduled for a check-up shortly).
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I didn't have one-tenth of the seriousness of your diagnosis, and I *still* get all tensed up when I go to the doctor. For, like, anything.